Smart Girls Who Do Stupid Things

Sometimes…

Oh You Know, It’s Just The Red Carpet Of The 2012 Oscars

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5:44 pm Pharrell is here? Talking about Hans Zimmer and Union regulations. So I guess he helped on the music for this show or something.

We get it Michelle. You’re cute and dainty.

Bérénice Bejo and Viola Davis decided to wear exactly the same outfit and have exactly the same hair color. Kelly Osbourne: “I love that she kept her hair the way that it is” aka LIKE A BLACK WOMAN.

5:47 pm George and Stacy are not the couple of the night, Kelly Osbourne. One dude cannot hold up the dead weight of his partner.

5:54 pm Rooney Mara blah blah. I still like her sister better. Also BUSY PHILLIPS.

Glenn Close is wearing a blazer. Alex: You are not weird enough to be wearing weird things. You are not Tilda.

Jonah Hill and his mom have the same nose.

Maya Rudolph says Beyonce is “lovely and cool and totally positive.” Unsurprising. Also Nelly Furtado “did not care for my impression of her.”

6:12 pm Giuliana: I love how Ryan’s ignoring me right now. Story of your life Giuliana — the one person that is supposed to listen to you doesn’t.

Oh “The Dictator.” Ryan is NOT pleased about his ash dusting ala The Big Lebowski. I hear, though I was in the bathroom for that moment, sadly.

E! gives us a close-up of the socks, as if we care.

6:23 pm Melanie Griffith and Antonio Banderas, my favorite couple. Melanie licks her lips while watching Antonio. Classic.

Tina Fey, wearing exactly what she always wears. That’s because it’s “custom” Carolina Herrera.

JENNIFER LOPEZ IS STANDING NEXT TO TINA FEY. J.Lo also chastises Ryan for making her wait, calls him baby twice, and has amazing-looking breasts (IRONIC FORESHADOWING).

Alex: Ryan, stop telling people this story about your “ashing.” It might be new to them, but it’s not new to us.

6:28 pm EMMA STONE. We’ve seen this dress before but I still love it. I like that her hair matches her dress. THEY SHAKE HANDS.

6:32 pm Why is Sarah Hyland on this panel? E! is obsessed with her.
Oh this is why, I’ve been informed.

6:45 pm ‏This explains everything: @brianstelter
Why isn’t E! showing the red carpet anymore? Per @AndyLevy, ABC has exclusive red carpet rights after 7:30p ET. (via @jonathanwald)

6:52 pm Nick Nolte got old real quick.
Penelope Cruz’s dress is a very different color than in pictures.

7:01 pm Cameron is “Roma chica trashy Italian” says Christopher, who just arrived.

7:04 pm Gwyneth and Cameron are best friends and got ready together? Sure…We’re just hearing about this?

7:12 pm Is Brad Pitt nominated for Troy 2?

Sandra, the plastic surgery…She just yelled about how happy she is to be here, which means she’d really like to be at home on the couch. Sandra, you’re invited over here.

7:20 pm Natalie looks 23 again. With greasy, hungover hair to match.

Kate: Why is Tom Hanks giving us a behind-the-scenes tour? Tamara: Because he’s like, a luminary.

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